Letter to a Rabbit

Dear Rabbit Lady,

I'm sorry that, in a fit of total insanity, I challenged you to make a sweater. I was in total denial about the month the calendar keeps offering me (even when I beg it not to) and, well, I guess a little part of me was assuming (hoping, doing evil spells to initiate) you'd forget or something. Anyway, I hope you won't lose interest in me just because I threw a fit when a nice little nicie sent me a lovely virus that has left my computer (on its good days) acting like a drunk nun with bad gas and vanished with great dramatic rambling from blog knitter craziness for a few weeks. I am working on getting a nuther computer (spelling errors are hard for me, a journalism major, to insert - but maybe if I piss you off with bad grammar - you'll get bored and just say you forgive me) but that must come after I have completed the next two weeks of self deprivation and become a total sleep-deprived, pent-up-bitchy-artist creep.

Realizing that I am sucky competition for you almost made me abandon my current project and start working on the cursed cape (wait, I changed my mind again, I want to go back to the burma rings sweater I tried to make months ago...After that, the sh-t couldn't seem to hit the fan so it gave up and began pelting my house like an air assault, so, I figure to repair karma, I will 'go back to the beginning'. But at the time the guilt was crushing me, this little guy only had a head and a lamb with no ears is really a pathetic sight. Trust me on this. We saw an earless goat at the spring auction this year and everyone still gets nauseated thinking about it.

Instead of using my unfair advantage of maniacal rage against the living to get a move on the sweater, I spun up these skeins of yarn last week for my upcoming show. Relax, most are singles so it was quicker than it may seem. Still, imagine this translated into sweater knit mania. Really, wouldn't you prefer I be lame in competing and put my hostility to some other purpose than knitting burma rings? So, here I am, not only a totally useless partner in this sweater knitting thing, but also a covert liar. See, I will be swamped with show stuff I can't possibly get done in twelve days for just that long. But, then, just you wait until my 14th anniversary, my favorite show of the year, and canning season is over. I'm gonna make dust on burma rings then. Oh, the canning, I forgot. In my spare time- I've made about 20 jars of blackberry jam, 20 canned green beans, and 32 dilly beans. We like our dilly beans. See what I mean? I have no energy at all. I am totally serene......