Spinning, Knitting, Crocheting, Organic Gardening, Living off-grid, and chasing sheep - because- I'm, like, NOT SANE!

Sunday, August 13, 2006

Futile Optimism

I usually avoid topics pertaining to the plights of womanhood - assuming we all know them well. But, I must preface this post by saying that the cruel concoction that has been formed by 1)raging hormones 2)a lifetime of hostility and rage 3)a hayfever season that I was glad to suffer through since our hay guy had over half his fields mown and waiting to be baled into hay for my critters this winter - which has now been hit by repeated random rain showers so it will be like black tar instead and 4)lots of ragweed may make me more prone to insult, accuse, or down-right attack ANYONE at ANYTIME.

It's moments like these that show the shine on Cancers, I think. Some people, when bombarded with failure and defeat, get depressed. Some become self-indulgent greedy bastards, some sit around whipping themselves all day. But Cancers, in general, can be counted on for the 'rising from the ashes' with a new hope that must either impress the weary or nauseate the jaded. I tried spinning but my maniacal treadling was not conducive to a nice, even yarn. I would have carded wool but my carding equipment is still packed in the 'off-season' boxes and I'm too lazy to get it all out. So, I raided my 'yarn sales' stash and heated up the dye pots for some random sock patterning yarn mania. After doing all this, I felt some relief. I've only manage to re-skein one colorway and here's how it came out: There we are, now, goofy smile back in place and people aren't running from me anymore. A cup of coffee and some organic dark chocolate and they'll smell the nice return so fast I'll be cramming the chocolate down before they come again with their "Mom, can I have...?" "Mom, can you read me....?" "Honey, would ya.....?" ARGH!

nOW, on to the sad pathetic reality of what has resulted of my 'attack'. I understand that the game of who will finish a sweater vs. who will knit a Marc a bikini began while I was indulging in psychosis. Ya'll, Rabbitch has already received her yarn and done a swatch! Tricky little wabbit. Well, after I had a total hissy fit about it, I sat down and started spinning the last of my 'mermaid over the years' fibers. I started my whole fiber selling on a set of batts I made once that I called 'Queen Mermaid'. She was well loved. People asked for more. I made lots. But, even though I had to sell most of it to keep the sheep from looking too skinny, I always kept back at least one batt of each batch. They are as random as myself but over time they have become more and more refined. I've spun them up and am going to make something like the pinwheel sweater on elann (hide your wallet before you go there or make sure you are supervised). I say 'something like' because, as you know, I suffer from Utfap Disorder (unable to follow a pattern) and as I never know when an attack will strike, I always start a project at my own risk. If I end up with leg warmers instead, do not be dismayed - it is an 'organic' process! In keeping with my senseless inablility to be rational in the face of despair - I cast on a pair of socks with the new sock yarn I made instead of swatching the mermaid sweater. I just didn't want certain persons to be under the impression I'm sweating or anything. This is me. Calm. Cool. and Deluded.